The Bachelor Grilling Party

Marriage is a huge responsibility. It is the opportunity to display a picture of the Gospel to the entire world. In Ephesians chapter 5, after speaking about the sacrificial love a husband should have for his wife, Paul concludes by telling the reader that marriage is an opportunity to display a picture of the Gospel to the entire world. A husband is called to love his wife as Christ loves the Church. Now, most husbands fail miserably within seconds of saying “I do”, and that’s why most healthy churches surround each young man with godly accountability.

Over the past few years of being involved in weddings, we have regularly had a “Bachelor Grilling


Party”. While there is certainly meat involved, the grilling has less to do with animals and more to do with the bachelor. The idea is that you bring in as many godly people in the room as possible, and after a time of fellowship, you sit the guy front and center in the hot seat and allow everyone to give him advice and challenge him to think rightly about his marriage. Of course this doesn’t replace pre-marital counseling, but I believe this can be a very encouraging and challenging time for everyone involved. Here are 7 benefits of having a “Bachelor Grilling Party”.


  • It promotes discipleship

Each time I was a part of something like this, everyone in the room walked away excited about discipleship. We all love having godly, wiser men in the room with many years of marriage under their belt to encourage and challenge all of us to think rightly about marriage. In addition to receiving helpful advice, it also gives young men the thirst to become like these men. At the same time, it reminds older men of the importance of investing in the younger.

  • It encourages singles to pursue marriage the right way

All the singles in the room get to hear about what a commitment marriage is. They get to watch a young man take marriage seriously, and be told about the huge responsibility he has. Many singles will be in the room and will leave with a greater desire of pursuing people of the opposite sex with good intentions, and with the right motives.

  • It gives a weight of responsibility to the groom

The groom sits there hearing about the blessings as well as the difficulties of marriage. He is given tips and suggestions that he may or may not remember, but what he will remember is the importance of what he is about to do. He is reminded about the importance of personal purity. He is reminded about the importance of growing in knowledge of the Word. He is reminded about his selfish nature and the need to die to self. Ultimately, he is reminded about the fact that he is the leader of the home and needs to develop leadership skills.

  • It reminds the married about their own commitment


Each time I am reminded of my own struggle to abide by everything that is brought up.  Each time is a reminder of my failure and my need to grow in so many areas. Each time is also a reminder of how thankful I am to God for providing me with a godly wife who complements me so well. I can’t help but leave that meeting with a desire to grow and to love my wife better.

  • It is God glorifying

The whole event is predicated on a desire to display marriage the way God intended it. God is exalted by believers biblical encouragement of each other. He is the focus of the entire evening, and pleasing and glorifying him better is the goal.

  • It is encouraging to the dads

The dads are usually there and get to see their sons take marriage seriously. The father-in-law gets to watch as a young man is showered with encouragement and challenged to take care of his daughter. Fathers in the room are reminded about the fact that one day they will be walking their daughters down the aisle and so they are encouraged to be better fathers.

  • It is evangelistic

Sometimes there are people in the room who do not know Christ. It could be an unsaved father, groomsmen, or friend. They will hear about marriage, about purity, about knowing God, and ultimately they will get to hear the Gospel. This is a great opportunity to tell the unsaved about God’s desire for every marriage and what it displays.

All it takes is one person in the church to start this practice. Wherever you are, you can come together for a night and encourage the young men to have a right view of marriage.


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