JESUS JUST WANTS TO GIVE YOU A HUG?

Jesus Just Wants to Give You a Hug?

Over thirty years ago, the great philosopher Paul McCartney asked, "What's wrong with silly love songs?"  Having given this over three decades of serious consideration (OK, at least several months), I have Sir McCartney's answer. 

It depends.

If you want to fill the world with silly love songs, there's nothing wrong with that.  But if you want to fill the church with them, I say, "Stop it!"

Tune into your "get you through your day" Christian music station and you will hear grown men, whining like love sick puppies, "Nothing else can take your place, or feel the warmth of your embrace."  Who are they singing to? The One who holds the universe together by the power of His word, or a chick?

Take the Quiz

Here are six phrases from six contemporary songs.  Can you pick which phrases belong to secular songs and which to the sacred?

1. All I need to do is just be me, being in love with you.

2. My world stops spinning round, without you.

3. I never want to leave; I want to stay in your warm embrace.

4. I'm lost in love.

5. Now and forever, together and all that I feel, here's my love for you.

6. You say you love me just as I am.

The first three are from a popular Christian band called Big Daddy Weave, the second half are from Air Supply.  

More and more of our Christian music is sounding one note: Jesus loves you soooooo much.  Do I doubt for a second that Jesus loves His children? Nope, but it depends on what your definition of "love" is.

God "agape" loves His children.  Agape love is not an emotions based, warm and fuzzy kind of love.  Agape love is a self sacrificing, "I will help you despite how I feel" love.

William Tyndale was the first translator to use the word "love" for agape.  Prior to the 16^th century, the word "charity" best described agape.  Leaving that debate aside, since Tyndale's time, the English definition for love has expanded.  Our modern day use of love ranges from a love for an object to physical love/sex (eros love).  I love that new car.  I love that girl.  I love that God.  That God loves me.

Not only do we use "love" in romantic ways to sing about God, we have added other romantic phrases to our Christian music repertoire: hold me, embrace me, feel you, need you.  This criticism is not new, in fact, it has existed since Godly men began endeavoring to sing anything but the Psalms.

John Wesley considered an "amatory phrase" to be language that was more feelings based love than self-sacrificing agape love.  John deleted "Jesus, Lover of My Soul" from one of his brother Charles' collections because it was too romantic sounding.

Amatory Phrasing

Not only are musicians guilty of writing amatory phrases, but they are singing with amatory phrasing.  Christian men sing with such romantic longing and neediness it makes me want to scream, "Man up!"

Christian women are singing with such throaty breathiness you would think they had just run from their home to the studio.  To whom exactly are they singing? Brad Pitt or the Savior?

There are two consequences to this "Jesus is my boyfriend/girlfriend" music.  Needy, emotional women continue to need more counseling, self help books and conferences where they can spread their wings and soar.  Men simply are not showing up for church.  It is my belief they simply can't stand the mood manipulating worship times designed to help them "feel the Lord's embrace."

Musical Mermaids

Without theology in music, we are offering fluff that will not comfort when bridges collapse and test reports are negative.  Songwriters could provide true hope if they would write about the sovereignty of God rather than crying about "how safe I feel when Jesus is holding me."

Charles Spurgeon had the same criticism of "Hymns for Heart and Voice" published in 1855.  He condemned the hymns as being "little better than mermaids, nice to look at but dangerous because they cannot deliver what they promise."

Is there anything wrong with being reminded that our God is our help from ages past?  Of course not, the Psalms are loaded with promises of God's comfort.  But unlike the Psalms (and theology based hymns), contemporary music is void of the reason why we should not worry.  We do not worry because someone purrs that we shouldn't fret, but because God is our shelter in the stormy blast and our eternal home.  Our comfort comes from knowledge, not caterwauling.

If you enjoy a silly love song now and then, knock yourself out.  But leave them where they belong, in the world or in the bedroom, not in the church.

By Todd Friel Email: todd@wayofthemasterradio.com Click here for bio and archived articles

Jesus Just Wants to Give You a Hug Posted On: 12/14/07 05:19:41 PM Age 47, MN The title to the article has a modicum of truth, however before Christ embraced me as a son He had to slam me over the head with the crowbar of the Law. Many of today CCM artists are by-products of pathetic churches that puke health-and -wealth New Age drivel and are indistinguishable from secular musicians. Give me the lyrics to "Amazing Grace" any day to remind me from whence I came and the spiritual sickness from which my Saviour healed me. I challenge any CCM prima donna to write any lyrics so theologically deep and profound. BTW to all you CCM artists out there here's a reminder: Your Dove Awards won't amount to much in the day of judgement. As the angel told John in The Revelation: Worship God. Music is not a spiritual gift Posted On: 12/13/07 08:29:29 PM Age 42, MO Good words, Todd. It's important to understand that true worship is spawned by the Gospel, and not by music. Aaron Tough Men, Weak Women, and Music Style. Posted On: 12/08/07 02:26:51 AM Age 45, CANADA I think the article makes some very good points. There are many songs that have poor theology. I agree that there should be difference between love songs about “boyfriend/girlfriend” relationship and our love relationship with God. But this guy mixes truth with a whole lot of nonsense. In fact, there is so much nonsense in this article that in my eyes in invalidates his good points. Some comments follow. Mike. “grown men, whining like love sick puppies” Why does he say whining? Is that his perception of particular contemporary music styles? “Christian men sing with such romantic longing and neediness it makes me want to scream, “Man up!” The author probably drives a muscle car and he hates Celine Dion. Needy, romantic men are broken. Real men don’t eat quiche. Does he have this same “tough” view of God? “The One who holds the universe together by the power of His word” In his opinion, there is no way God the Father, as the perfect (tough) Male, could be very emotional. God drives a Diesel V8 Dodge RAM truck with tandem wheels. “Christian women are singing with such throaty breathiness” Oh yes. He is complaining about musical styles that he dislikes. This goes to the heart of his opinions. I have little time for people when they attack based on musical style. “...or a chick?” I think most people find that word offensive. Either this is his view of women, or he is just pushing buttons. Actually, I’m guessing it may be a bit of both. “Needy, emotional women continue to need more counseling, self help books and conferences” Ah, he does have problematic views of women. He thinks they are weak, easily broken. Too unmanly. “Men simply are not showing up for church.” Yes, Men are more likely to drop from attending church. But I wonder, is this because emotionally needy chicks are manipulating them through music? I think Men not showing up for church has been true in many past eras, not just 2007. I do think that some men are looking for a different mix of music style than they find at their church. But I think it is style of music; I don’t think it has as much to with substance of topic in the lyrics. But ultimately, I think other big issues are at play to keep them away. “Agape love is not an emotions based...” I’m not trained enough in this to know if this is true? Does God only have agape love for us? Is Agape as limited as he says? He says Agape is more like “I will help you despite how I feel”. Is that really all the bible says about God’s love for us? Is God not emotionally a loving god? Is his version of love more like charity than what we would call love today? Anyway, I think church music is probably just reflecting the image of God’s love that we have been taught from the time we are kids. If the music is wrong to use the word love, I think it is because the church is wrong. Jesus loves the little children. The writer states that we have more meanings for the word “love”. Then he goes on the assume that phrases like “hold me, embrace me” are romantic love – “boyfriend/girlfriend” as he says. But if God is our Father, then doesn’t he have some love like a parental love? Can’t I hold or embrace my children without it becoming a boyfriend/girlfriend kind of love? The Quiz is cute. But he’s taking quotes out of context. And I bet there have been many popular hymns and Christian songs past that had stupid little phrases in them. Hopefully the better content survives and “fluff” goes away. “contemporary music is void of the reason why we should not worry” I could say all hymns are old fashioned and passe, with old english that is meaningless to people born after 1970. But you can’t paint all songs of a particular era with the same brush. “but they are singing with amatory phrasing” There’s that music style thing again. “caterwauling” Definition: to utter long wailing cries. This guy clearly hates some contemporary music styles. Amen! Posted On: 12/07/07 01:24:02 AM Age 47, MO Hey friend: I've enjoyed this conversation and respect your POV. You made your points well and I think we both totally agree with one another. However, I will have to reread Todd's article to see where exactly he is coming from. If memory serves me right, his point is that the church is focussed on the emotion of experiencing God without the knowledge of knowing God. To that, I think we both agree is problematic and a grave eternal danger. Brother, keep the faith, Bless God. John And onto the beat.... Posted On: 12/06/07 02:47:21 PM Age 54, NC That's a good point about a Muslim being able to sing the same CCM lyrics a Christian would - and not notice any difference. A lot has been said here about lyrics; I'll comment on the rhythmic pulsation holding the words together. Here's what I think is actually heinous about all of this: Turn on the radio and you'll hear a ton of contemporary music that is either sexually or violently immoral. The lyrics are trash, and many of these songs have the exact same rhythm structure as CCM does. Most young people today listen to this kind of garbage. They hear the beat pulsate. They feel the sexual pull. Let's not pretend this isn't so, okay? And then these young people go to our churches and sing to Jesus with the same type of beat.... To me, there's just something sick about that. Sad to say, it seems that a lot of aged hippies from the sixties brought this sensual music into the church because they never quite outgrew puberty. I've heard CCM church musicians talk about their favorite Led Zeppelin songs. To appreciate Zeppelin, you've got to appreciate the wrong kind of morals. What concerns me most is that young Christian people are being raised to only appreciate bubblegum for the ears, and once many people get hooked on it, they have trouble appreciating anything else of finer quality. It's like junk food. It's psychologically addictive. Anyway, we're losing a great store of Christian heritage with all these churches abandoning hymns for the sake of bringing in "seekers." I'm sorry, but carnal man does not by nature "seek God." But he does seek entertainment. Re: Re: Re: Re: Jesus Just Wants to Give You a Hug? Posted On: 12/06/07 12:48:13 PM Age 20, NV I can respect where you're coming from, brother, and this is basically why I tried to be careful and say that I am NOT stating love is just sappy feeling. God is love by nature in the triunal sense, i.e., the Father, Son and Spirit loving one another. Because Jesus is the Father's "Beloved," being a term of endearment, the Scipture tells us that we, in Christ, have become God's beloved, too. My problem with Todd's defintion of love can be summarized by his statement: "Agape love is a self sacrificing, “I will help you despite how I feel” love." In one respect that is true, though I think it more refers to us as imperfect humans in a fallen world and how we must love even though we may feel contrary. But to delete "feeling" from love all-around would be a mistake. In Heaven, there will be nothing to induce false feelings. God sees us as wrapped in Christ. He does not look down upon us and say, "Well, you really ticked me off, but I'll help you anyway even though I don't feel like it." That is not the way the Scripture presents God's love. It is because He sees us in Christ, perfected through Him, that we are actually dear to Him, like a child to his father or a bride to her groom (Scripture uses both comparisons). If love is nothing more than sacrifice or helping people, they wouldn't be distinct in the Scripture (cf. 1 Cor 13:3), and Paul wouldn't have prayed about our ability to know that love as he did (Eph 3:17-19). The Lord doesn't want obedience apart from our passion and love for Him. He wants our obedience and worship BECAUSE of that love. Technically, a legalist can obey Christ and still have no love for Christ. But we were created and redeemed to be in a loving relationship with God, and to worship Him in that love. Re: Re: Re: Re: Jesus Just Wants to Give You a Hug? Posted On: 12/05/07 12:28:13 PM Age 47, MO Friend: It is hard to respond to you because all the words you write does nothing but confuse your point and lose the reader. Therefore I will pull one quote and respond to that. You wrote: "Genuine love is "emotion" that is demonstrated by action." I completely disagree. Genuine love is Christ because love is a characteristic of God. Agape love is sacrificial giving which is the manifestation of Christ in our lives. Therefore, true love for a Christian, is obedience to Christ. To die to self and be alive in Christ is the Christian life. Emotion has nothing to do with it. Emotion only serves to quicken the heart to action. However, one can have the resolve to act sacrificially and this may or may not have resulted from emotion. To equate emotion with love or hate is to make emotion the force of action. No friend, Love or Hate is the force, not the emotion, again reinforcing the arguement that they originate in Christ or Satan. So again, emotion ONLY serves to quicken the heart, Jesus NEVER operated from emotion but truth. John Re: Jesus Just Wants to Give You a Hug? Posted On: 12/04/07 09:22:35 PM Age 38, KY Interesting to read this article just a couple of days after being upset by the music selection by the local church. Sunday a small singing group sang "All You Need is Love" by John Lennon. You know the lyrics "love, love, love..". I could not imagine using any song by Christian hater John Lennon who only supported love that suited him. This is a Southern Baptist church. How quickly they forget that Souther Baptist did not accept is fake apology for these words he uttered in 1966: "Christianity will go. It will vanish and shrink.... I don't know what will go first, rock 'n' roll or Christianity. We're more popular than Jesus now. Jesus was all right, but his disciples were thick and ordinary. It's them twisting it that ruins it for me." We need to be more careful in the music we are using. The last thing we need is to turn another young person onto John Lennon vibe. Keep secular music out of the church. The "religious" music is getting bad enough. Re: Re: Jesus Just Wants to Give You a Hug? Posted On: 12/02/07 03:52:44 PM Age 47, MO Not only is Jesus not our "lover," Jesus is the love. He is I AM. He is what love is, so for us to love is to reflect Jesus. Jesus said if you remain in me, I'll remain in you. I am sick of Christians seeking the gifts of Christ, the tools in the shed and shunning the Gift giver- the true gift! We do this because we like to define love to our liking- blessings, joy, moving worship, etc.- but it makes a weak Christian and a lopsided Christ. We need to get back to Christ and worship in Spirit and in Truth. John Re: Re: Re: Jesus Just Wants to Give You a Hug? Posted On: 12/01/07 10:04:54 PM Age 20, NV I agree with that. I did not intend to say that love is just feeling or emotion, per se, as we seem to know those words in our culture. Feelings come and go, whereas true love is not fickle like that. People can feel and not have love, but they can also give & sacrifice and not have love (cf. 1 Corinthians 13:3). Genuine love is DEMONSTRATED by giving (John 3:16). Feelings alone can be deceptive. I just was pointing out that we all, by nature, know what love is. Even the wordlings who misdefine it know deeply within their fallen spirits what genuine love is; some remnant of that truth is left, and I think that's what Dr. Hodge was getting at. So my point was that it's a mistake to say that God's love is just giving WITHOUT emotion. His people, seen as elect in and accepted in the Beloved (Ephesians 1:6) for Christ's sake, are also His beloved (Colossians 3:12; John 17:23), His children, His Bride, His Church. Genuine love is "emotion" that is demonstrated by action. We give obedience to God because we love Him (John 14:15), our obedience being the demonstration to God that He has our hearts for Himself. God gave His Son as proof of His love to us. The late Dr. D.G. Barnhouse once described worship as "love that gives upward." God loved us simply because He chose to (Deuteronomy 7:7-8), and the goal of His love is that angels and men would worship Him, that is, love Him in return. As the Puritan Thomas Shepard once said, "Consider it is nothing else but love the Lord looks for, or cares for. Love looks for nothing but love, (Prov. 8:17,) and this is the end of all election, to be holy before him in love; and, mark it, if it be a stayed love that constrains thee to him, you can not wrong him. As if you come and persuade one to murder his child, he can not; so if persuaded to despise, O, bowels of heartbreaking love. 2 Cor. 5: And surely it is admirable love. What if it were thy goods, thy Isaac to be sacrificed, thy body to be burned, it was nothing; but he desires only love, only thy heart, which has forged so much villany against him. Let him never be called upon, or professed, if not worthy of this. After all, is this all? Yes, no portion he cares for; and when he has this, he has all. Wonder at this, O angels!" (end quote) God bless.